The Spice of Variety – The Importance of Mixing It Up In the Boudoir (On The Page, Of Course!)

My personal oeuvre is gritty, raw, erotic romance. I have Dominant Alpha heroes, and feisty submissive heroines. I love intense love scenes, filled with graphic action hot enough to scald. But there are always occasions where I have to mix it up.

By and large I find, in my writing and in the erotic romances I read, that no matter how intense the story is, no matter how dark or dramatic, there come those moments when you need things less intense and more languid. Filled with less boom-chicka-bow-wow and more with velvet caresses and sensual sighs. Where perhaps, something kinder and gentler is called for. Perhaps one of the characters is wounded, at a black point, and the love scene is, in part, a healing or comforting for that character. Or another alternative that may be a perfect fit, something lighthearted - spiced with wry humor, or giddy joy – the occasion when nothing goes right, but it’s all okay! Where my lovers learn to laugh at themselves and relax . . . just a bit more (which we know will make things even hotter the next time around, right?)

One of the things I therefore focus on is the appropriateness of the tone and action of the scene: Does it fit the mood? The place where the characters are both in their own heads at that moment? In the course of their relationship? All while furthering that relationship, working smoothly with the plot, and advancing it at the same time.

I also survey of my love scene “roster” once I’ve got a rough first draft, to ensure that the mood and intensity does vary, so the reader is not treated to the same old, same old love scene throughout. (That’s a major complaint I’ve seen concerning the love scenes in FSOG, for example.) No one in the real world has sex the same way all the time, or feels the same way every time they are having sex. The intensity varies, the commitment varies, and the emotions vary.

Our moods fuel our lovemaking. Internal and external conflicts of my characters will fuel theirs. As will the seasons, surroundings, the atmosphere (one example is the staple of romantic suspense and romantic thrillers where the lovers are in the thick of danger – gotta love those adrenalin-heightened couplings!).

Likewise, the love scenes will morph as the characters and relationships grow and change. That introductory, somewhat stilted, or perhaps edgy, or eager and unfamiliar first love scene – where everything is being experienced for the first time, and those first sights of one another, those first tastes and touches are so vital.

Then the story grows into those scenes where the lovers have become more comfortable with one another, but are still discovering the depths of their passion; they’re exploring and trying new things – but there are still mysteries to unfold, and discoveries about one another to make.

And we continue to progress, reaching those scenes where the lovers are embroiled in their conflicts and problems as you approach the dark moments of the book. Their differences, fears and uncertainty infiltrate the scene. It might make the love/sex desperate, or yearning – or lousy. It might make one lover selfish and demanding, or another withdrawn and hesitant. And it might be a moment for coitus interruptus – the better to ramp up the tension, sexual and otherwise, as the characters deal with it.

Finally, the couple’s emotions are fully mature, and the depth of their love is powerful and strong and committed. As we approach their HEA, so does their sexual relationship swell in power and importance. Everything has become clear. They’ve overcome all the crises. They’ve fallen apart and healed those rifts. They’re recommitted, or reunited, with a soul deep connection that is illustrated in their lovemaking. Physical and emotional have become one, and the coupling is a hallowed moment as the sex becomes an affirmation of their romantic journey together.

So. Each of the moments within my stories have to satisfy many criteria. First and foremost, from a technical perspective, I want to change it up. Keep the sex varied for the readers (and my characters – can you imagine the complaints?!).

Secondly, I want my love scenes to fit smoothly in the moment in the story in which they appear. A humorous love scene in a dark moment probably wouldn’t work. And a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am when they’ve just acknowledged they’re madly in love would be inappropriate, too. And no brand new couple, falling into the sack for the first time is going to be utterly uninhibited. No matter how tough or feisty or Alpha, we all hold back a bit of ourselves in a brand new relationship, right? It’s a protective instinct to avoid hurt and rejection.

Thirdly, I must remain true to my characters, which means that even as the love scenes evolve along with the story, and with the relationship, they must reflect the ongoing tone, or mood of the moment. The actions cannot go completely against the characters’ grain. But they can reflect that changing moods of the character.

My hero may be a crude and rough sadist, but he will find himself in a romantic situation where his emotions, and desires, prompt him to seek a different way to experience that sexual relationship. By doing so, it allows my hero an opportunity for revelation – for growth. As I did with my down and dirty sadist hero, Hud, in Hold Tight, when he abandons all of the paddlings and spankings, the erotic humiliation and total command of his lover, Eden, and discovers that the more vanilla experience is just as rich, and enjoyable – and even more naked, emotionally – without the trappings of the lifestyle or kinky touches. The simple act of making love is a breakthrough moment as he realizes she’s “the one”. It’s not just the kink. It’s the woman.

Likewise, no matter how freely my submissive Eden gives herself to Hud, there comes that moment when she turns dominant, forcing him to accept her and his own desires, and becomes the driving force of that particular love scene – the climactic one that ends the story.

The bottom line is that I want my characters to change it up in the bedroom. It keeps things lively for them – and keeps my readers looking ahead to see how the characters’ physical relationship grows along with their emotional relationship.

Because as we all know, variety is the spice of life!

Lise Horton writes super steamy erotic romance and, as Lydia Hill, intense erotica. She’s published in full-length fiction by Carina Press, and in short fiction by Ravenous Romance, Riverdale Avenue Press (a recent naughty coupling can be found in RAB’s “Bad Santa”) and her latest story, “Tryst of Fate”, as Lydia Hill, is included in the Cleis Press “Best Women’s Erotica of 2015” anthology, edited by the iconic Violet Blue.. For more on her thoughts on writing romance and the writing life, you can find her and all her social media links at www.lisehorton.com.

Floggers and Ball Gags & Cuffs – Oh My, My. My

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Lust Scenes?

I write super-hot love scenes. I especially like writing kink like ménage and BDSM, and the hotter and more graphic, the better. During a recent discussion a fellow author said that “sex scenes aren’t love scenes”. I feel I must respectfully – and strongly – disagree. Admittedly, what is “romantic”, or “sexy” to one reader, is not to another, so bottom line is to each her own! (And isn’t it great? Plenty of readers for everyone!)

For those who do not read erotic romance, with its full-contact, graphic sex scenes, they may not immediately appear to be all about love. In some cases in fact, the story may NOT begin with a couple (or more) who are already “in love”, or already falling emotionally, before they indulge in the physical; one difference from less steamy romances. But they are always people who are embarking on a relationship because of an immediate attraction or growing into a committed love relationship, even if it may stem from an initially sexual relationship. I think it’s important to note this initial attraction is unlike anything they’ve ever known – there’s chemistry, but also something “more”. This lets a reader know which way the wind WILL soon be blowing, emotionally.

I strive in my stories - complete with HEAs – to illustrate just how romantic, emotional and psychologically satisfying a sexually graphic love scene can be. In order to convey this truth, I need to make sure my characters – and their actions - are immediate and believable. So I do tons of research about providing emotional and psychological detail in my characters and their love scenes.
For example, using kink means showing why my characters are kinky. How that sexual preference evolved, and how it ties into their emotional make-up. I have read a lot of kinky erotic romance that contains things I would not personally want to participate in. However, that doesn’t mean the author was not successful in making those scenes really hot and erotic for me! (I’m one of those whatever-blows-your-skirt-up kind of gals, after all.)



Or if I am using Dominance and submission elements (D/s) (I’m not a creative “switch” – my heroes are always the dominant ones, my heroines always submissives) I need to do a psychological study of my characters to show why they are the way they are. In particular, with a heroine who is a submissive (which can mean many different things, but it doesn’t mean that she is not a strong, independent character): Is she a submissive only in the boudoir? That means she can be a total take-charge woman in other aspects of her life. I love the dichotomy of a female who loves being controlled in bed, but woe betide the man who tries it any other time! Or is she a submissive personality 24/7, meaning that her hero will dominate her both in bed, as well as be her protector in life? I have a character in a current WIP that is a 24/7 submissive personality. She has been physically wounded, emotionally tormented, and is adrift and alone. Finding a masterful man who takes care of her and helps her regain her stability is a relief and a blessing for her. It is a big plus that he is a wonderful, caring lover who helps her understand her feelings in bed, allowing her to blossom and enjoy her true sexual nature. But my hero’s proclivities and motivations must also be made crystal clear. He is not simply a megalomaniac out to control a woman’s life. He will be the masterful man she needs, within the context of his dominant, protective nature, especially when it comes to their sex life. He is compassionate about her desires and dreams, and helps her achieve them. He doesn’t use force or coercion to make her do what HE wants!

I do a lot of research. I read BDSM lifestyle books. I read books on alternative sexualities and their psychological aspects. I also read a wide selection of erotic romance for tips, and to see how far others push the envelope of kinkiness, and to see if other authors successfully (to me) create emotionally gripping, kinky characters.

Before writing, I create a character sexual biography for each protagonist. It contains every single element of my characters’ sex life, from family teachings, to religion, first lovers, as well as all the negatives – bad experiences, fears, taboos. I include “worldbuilding” elements which impact their belief systems, or dictate sexual development. When I get to “present” circumstances I clarify their likes, dislikes, desires, and their own feelings (Curious? Scared? Embarrassed?). I log possible reactions to new lover(s) and new sexual experiences. I catalogue how these events will change them, emotionally and psychologically – filling unfilled needs, resolving old issues, revealing new sides of their sexual selves. And I go in depth clarifying their motivation and conflicts as they apply to the sexual plot, as well as how they tie into the overall plot: Her growth and how she’ll be helped to surmount these conflicts to achieve happiness on all fronts.

Once I have a clear picture of exactly what the character is like I can make appropriate plot choices and/or appropriate choices for characteristics, and actions & reactions in sexual situations. My goal is to have honest, believable, understandable characters who a reader can travel along with on the sexual journey - a journey entwined with the emotional and romantic one.

Then I ramp up the fun and make sure everything is hot hot hot! Because, after all, as a famous hedonist once said, “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!”

A MUSE OF FIRE: All The World’s A Stage – Setting & Description

. . . And let us, ciphers to this great accompt,
On your imaginary forces work.
Suppose within the girdle of these walls
Are now confined two mighty monarchies,
Whose high upreared and abutting fronts
The perilous narrow ocean parts asunder:
Piece out our imperfections with your thoughts;
Into a thousand parts divide on man,
And make imaginary puissance;
Think when we talk of horses, that you see them
Printing their proud hoofs i' the receiving earth;
For 'tis your thoughts that now must deck our kings,
Carry them here and there; jumping o'er times,
Turning the accomplishment of many years
Into an hour-glass . . .
(Excerpt, Act I Prologue, Henry V, by William Shakespeare)

In theatre, a play’s author gives bare setting descriptions. Then the director and set designer work together to create the living set on which the play will be enacted. Whether it includes a falling chandelier, rotating sets and waterfalls or a spare, single room presentation, it takes an entire team to create the effective setting so the audience can see the visual rendering of the world of the play’s creator.
As writers of fiction, there is a good side, and a bad side, to our job as the sole designer of setting and our use of description. The upside: Our readers will imagine, based on our words, the place, and the setting that fits perfectly for them within the context of the story. No risk of disappointment as happens in theatre, or film, where the end result does not match the visual the readers had already created from the books. But the same plus, is also the downside. Because YOU are the sole creator of the setting. If you skimp on it, or if your description fails to captivate and conjure a sense of place for your story – then there’s no THERE there for your audience: The Reader.

Shakespeare gave his audience tremendous setting and atmosphere hints via his chorus speeches and prologues (such as I opened this piece with). His words allowed his audiences to fill in the blanks and augment the stage set with the grand world and events amid which his plays were to transpire.

He utilizes dialogue, as well, to enhance the sense of time and place, as in the first words of King Lear in Act III, Scene II, as he enters with the Fool in the midst of a storm:

“Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! Rage! Blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drench’d our steeples, drown’d the cocks!
You sulphurous and thought-executing fires,
Vaunt-couriers to oak-cleaving thunderbolts,
Singe my white head! And thou, all-shaking thunder,
Strike flat the thick rotundity o’ the world!
Crack nature’s moulds, all germens spill at once
That make ingrateful man!”

You have the opportunity to do this task utilizing both narrative as well as characters’ own description in thought or dialogue.

But how many elements go into crafting an effective setting?

Some major ones would be time, place, era, season, weather, temperature. What are they and how are you conveying this information? What impact or effect do these elements have on the narrative/action? Is it backdrop? Does it enhance the mood? Is it part of the challenge to the characters in the context of forward action?

Then there are the subtleties that more specific description adds to your setting. Like a set designer your eye must fall on every single nook and cranny of your setting. Then decide what is vital, and what is unimportant for your scenic design and what details would be innocuous, and can be ignored. How does describing the important elements help make your setting richer, bolder and more conducive to drawing your reader into your world – so that it runs like a film in their head as they read.

Take for example a set piece – a clock, which can be utilized both as a set design element and as a detail to help establish time frame, perhaps, or passage of time, as it ticks away the minutes. How can this element be adding to your atmosphere. Does it toll the ominous passing of time as the heroine desperately attempts to escape her bonds and flee the killer coming for her? Does it register the mounting excitement as a bride awaits her bridegroom on their honeymoon night? The frustration of a woman awaiting her lover who is late, or the trepidation of a character awaiting news of a job interview, the angst of a parent awaiting word on a sick child? Or does it notch up the erotic tension as a man watches his lover coming towards him to begin their tryst?

From ensuring that your description is specific: Is your heroine’s hair blown by a wind? Or is it a zephyr, a gale, an icy gust? Here’s where your word selection will come into play, and remember that action words convey more than non-action descriptors, details that bring to mind sense responses – especially touch and smell – can ramp up the depth of your setting. When elaborating on your setting include specific details that help anchor the time and place in your readers’ minds. Not just a city – is the city more like New York? Or Paris? Moscow, Shanghai or Casablanca? Kalamazoo or Kingston? Does the character live in a house surrounded by a garden? Or by a wild cacophony of wildflowers, daisies with bright faces, and nodding sunflowers? Is the smell permeating the room simply “food cooking”? OR is it the smell of old bacon grease and stale coffee, the pungent aroma of garlic and herbs, or the homey scent of meatloaf and cornbread? Is it raining? Or is it a typhoon, a sun shower, a nourishing spring rain, or a thundering downpour? Is the house just a house? Or a hobbit hole? A magical Weasley oddity or a dreary Kansas farmhouse?

What tiny elements can add atmosphere and mood to a set? What can help convey the tone and emotion of the characters in a given situation? What aspects of your setting and description round out and complete the world your characters inhabit so that – whether the setting is a space ship headed for Alpha Centauri in the year 2525, a Scottish castle in the highlands, or an upper West Side Manhattan one-bedroom apartment – it is a rich, vital, immediate and REAL world for your readers?

Like a combination playwright/set designer/director you must use all of your skills to build a perfect world – setting – and illuminate the place in which your novel’s action proceeds. From first page to last, in every chapter, scene, paragraph – your descriptive detail of the surroundings must be gripping, evocative, enlightening, compelling and they must sweep your reader away into a world so real that there IS a THERE there!

P.S: For some additional plays where marvelous “worlds” are created, try “The Iceman Cometh” by Eugene O’Neill, “The Hot L Baltimore” by Lanford Wilson, Sam Shepard’s “True West”, “Bus Stop” by William Inge, “Ghosts” by Henrik Ibsen, “Steel Magnolias” by Robert Harding or “The Skin of Our Teeth” by Thornton Wilder.

And for incredible setting and descriptive detail – within a story that runs from modern-day London, to the English countryside, as well as back into Victorian England and Italy, there is no more wonderful novel I have ever read than A. S. Byatt’s Booker Prize winning Possession. It is like a wonderful creative writing class all by itself!



I know a bank where the wild thyme blows,
Where oxlips and the nodding violet grows,
Quite over-canopied with luscious woodbine,
With sweet musk-roses and with eglantine:
There sleeps Titania sometime of the night,
Lull'd in these flowers with dances and delight;

Oberon, Act II, Sc. I “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”
William Shakespeare

A Muse of Fire: If Shakespeare Knew Then What We Know Now - Science & Writing Romance

Have you ever found yourself reading a romance and experienced one or more of the following: Teariness? Knots in your stomach? Smiling? Arousal? Heartbreak? It could be that the author of that novel was just THAT GOOD. Or it could be partly because of the physical experience of being a reader. It may seem odd, but science and fiction go hand in hand and romance fiction, in particular, in understanding the way people read; which can in turn guide us in how we write.

In Shakespeare’s day science was ruled in large part by superstition. Yet even without a Sigmund Freud to parse the human psyche, he wrote complex characters and timeless stories that continue to be beloved the world over. But what would he have created if he’d had access to the information we have today? Information provided by constantly advancing technology which has uncovered wondrous information about people, the human sexual and romantic experience, and how readers read?

How much time do you devote to the study of human physiology, neurobiology, psychology and sociology when you craft your stories? It is not as far-fetched a question as it sounds. We research sex and relationships, certainly, to ensure honest portrayals of what we write: love. But there is so much more to be discovered; discoveries that can add richness and astute detail and at the same time, be created to be read with the greatest impact.

How much thought do you give to the experience of a reader’s reading of your novel when writing? Not just the craft questions like plot, pacing, grammar and myriad other details: Do you think of how readers read? How the physical act of viewing words becomes recognition and how they engage, and are translated in, a reader’s mind?

In past workshops I’ve discussed the fact that the average reader “hears” the words she is reading, and how that knowledge can help author craft successful passages by choosing and arranging words to maximum effect. In another workshop on the five senses, I pointed out the difference in the way scent is interpreted by our brains from touch, sound and sight; scent is translated in a combination of brain activity, one linking the sensory experience with memory and feelings, making scent an exceptionally powerful sensory detail to use. I am purely fascinated by this kind of revelatory reading, not just for the science but for how I can apply this information to my writing.

Two recent articles in The New York Times, “Your Brain On Fiction” by Anne Murphy Paul (Sunday Review sec., 3/18/12) and “The Brain On Love” by Diane Ackerman (Sunday Review sec., 3/25/12) offer amazing theory and research.

In Paul’s article, fascinating details are revealed. For example, the choice of descriptive words being read alters the neurological response in a reader. Words that invoke touch sensations, “rouse the sensory cortex”. So a choice such as “the singer had a velvet voice” evokes a more potent response than does “the singer had a pleasing voice”. Further, words like lavender and cinnamon and other scent descriptors, elicit a response not just from the expected areas where language is processed, but other areas devoted to scent interpretation. Additionally, words describing motion “stimulate regions of the brain distinct from language-processing areas”, leading to revelations that these words incite activity in the motor cortex – the area of the brain involved with movement. Final observations indicate that the brain “does not make much of a distinction between reading about an experience and encountering it in real life”.

In addition to the physical, there are the social implications. One psychologist uncovered that “there was substantial overlap in the brain networks used to understand stories and the networks used to navigate interactions with other individuals”, and as readers we “identify with characters’ longings and frustrations, guess at their hidden motives and track their encounters with friends and enemies, neighbors and lovers”. Other scientists have shown that readers learn from their reading and, particularly in social situations, put this learned experience into play in real life (the “theory of mind”). Contrary to the British doctor who was certain that reading romance would make women have unreal expectations, could it be romance novels actually lead to healthier and more successful loving relationships?

Beyond the understanding of a reader’s physical perception, there is also the psychology and sociology of love, sex, romance and human relationships to explore.

Esquire magazine’s April sex survey issue revealed some startling (to me, at least) results: Men actually prefer smaller (albeit “perky”) breasts to more bountiful bosoms. And the preferred sexual position with 30% of the vote is cowgirl (or woman on top) which beat out the old standard missionary position by 2% points. The author’s own informal survey showed that 8 out of 10 men prefer giving oral sex to receiving it.

Another source’s study showed that the first thing a man notices about a woman is a gorgeous head of hair (legs, lips, face and body lag behind). And yet another study showed men react most strongly to women in red.

A past NY Times article discussed studies which provided new information about men, women and physical attraction; information that challenged commonly held thoughts about attraction and desire. Science continues to uncover challenges to long-held beliefs in numerous areas, which shed light not just on human physiology, but on the human experience itself – and how the two are interconnected.

In Ackerman’s article she delves into the new field of “interpersonal neurobiology”, in which studies have shown that people are actually neurologically changed in the course of relationships. Lovers bond in a fashion similar to the bonding of mother and child, and literal physical changes occur in the brain. Science, too, has actually explained the “whys” of the feelings following break-ups that our heart is “breaking”, or you can feel physically ill. Just as a disastrous romance can do that, being in a happy relationship changes the partners’ stress levels, fear reactions and actual physical perceptions. Women in happy relationships were given shocks to the ankles while alone, and their physical reactions gauged. They were then put together with their partner, holding hands and this time the shocks produced much reduced pain responses in the women. In another study, partners viewing a picture of a loved one experienced a “lighting up” of the reward centers in their brains. Ackerman concludes that “Loving relationships alter the brain the most significantly”.

Articles and books on these subjects can prove wonderfully enlightening for a writer who seeks to imbue her human characters with as much complex subtlety as possible, while engaging her readers on every level, from the conscious to the subconscious. So the next time you spy an article on science – don’t automatically pass it by. You never know what you’ll learn!

Can you imagine what amazing use Bill S. would have made with this knowledge?