Sunday, September 6, 2015

THE DEVIL’S IN THE KINKY DETAILS: BDSM Intensive with Dr. Charley Ferrer & Getting Kink Right

Internationally recognized sex expert, BDSM community advocate and Conference Founder, Dr. Charley Ferrer got the conference underway with her information packed intensive. Her drive to educate both the reading and the writing public about the lifestyle is fueled by her desire to make sure the misconceptions, and prejudices, can be avoided by writers who can portray the lifestyle accurately.

To that end, her talk was filled with the nuance and specifics of the BDSM lifestyle. From psychology to terminology, from the many roles participants may play, she urged us to “get it right when writing about kink, be it erotic romance, erotica, or any other form that discusses this subject matter. And this session reiterated for many of us, just how much we still have to learn about the lifestyle and its people.

One of the most important concepts that I took away (along with copious notes) is that it is vital to understand that there is no one type of participant (in real life, nor should there be in our books!).

And for me, that is a glorious treasure for me as an author.

As a former actress, I was not surprised by the revelation that I am a character-driven storyteller. Just as with a role, every performer’s take on that character will be unique. There will be no two Juliets alike. No two actors would be the same as Harry Potter. We’ve seen that several times over with James Bond and the various acting incarnations of that character.

So with my romantic tales populated by kinky characters, each foray into BDSM is driven by those characters. Each has different kinks. Each embraces a different dynamic. Each explores different desires, dreams and fears.

Where one player is a raunchy Dom with a penchant for spanking and nasty BJs, another is a sensuous sadist who loves building the anticipation until his submissive love teeters on the brink of sexual insanity. One loves expensive toys, the other pervertables. One heroine is a feisty gal with a quick comeback, the other a vulnerable soul yearning to belong.

Likewise, my characters each feel differently about their kinky predilections, and you’ll see that characters such as the ones we at the Con write run a gamut of personality types, emotional types, and diverse backgrounds. Each has different expectations to the lifestyle, each has different reactions, and each embraces different aspects. As they say, “your kink may not be my kink, but your kink is OK”. And it’s a concept you’ll see embraced throughout this writing community.

So learning some marvelous specifics about protocols and rituals, about play specifics, roles and types of players; learning that basically anything goes in the safe, sane and consensual world of BDSM allows me, and my fellow authors, the latitude to create special worlds, populated with a vast array of kinky characters to romance, to titillate, and entertain.

Which means that while Dr. Charley’s panoramic presentation was great for authors, it is hella great for readers who love their romance hot and kinky and twisted and filled with awesome characters of every type!

And hey you folks out there who haven’t discovered the joy of BDSM? Come on in! The water’s steamy!

1 comment:

  1. Lise,

    I'm so pleased you enjoyed my workshop and BDSM Writers Con. It's authors like yourself, Cris Anson, Rose C. Carole, Gray Dixon and all those that have returned year after year after year that make my soul smile. Our "reader" participants are fabulous as well returning with their husbands and friends to share in the D/s education we provide. And as you know, though we may repeat a class, it's never the same experience as our BDSM Experts shares so much more of their knowledge or playful demos. I look forward to seeing you again soon and reading more of your wonderful books some of which you mentioned were inspired by BDSM Writers Con.

    Live with passion,

    Dr. Charley Ferrer
    Host & Founder
    BDSM Writers Con

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